When we love someone too much
by 910328
Summary: It's over. Blood is soaking into the ground. Today we decide only about how to react to things that didn't depend on us, don't depend on us, and won't depend on us. This is just our bitter-sweet freedom. This is what we call our victory. Hinata knows it. I present to you Hinata's heart.


Hinata wasn't a bad person. Never in her life would be happy to someone's death. She didn't want anyone to suffer, and it hurt her, when she had to kill during the mission. Even if that was necessary to its success, she was treating death as a personal failure, her failure as a man and then it took her a long time to analyze her actions, wondering if killing was definitely the best, the only way of doing.

It was impossible for her to feel even a shadow of relief when they told her that Sakura is dead. Sakura wasn't her friend. A comrade, yes. A little rival, because Naruto was somehow crazy about her. Maybe even was in love with her. Maybe if not Sakura, Hinata had more daring and more chances that Naruto would notice her. So what? She was supposed to hate Sakura? Was it her fault? No. And when Hinata learned of her death, responded in the same way as she did when Neji died, with sincere tears, pain and disbelief.

Hinata wasn't crazy. Her thoughts wasn't circled only around Naruto. It was necessary to help Kiba, who was wounded. She had to take care of Neji's body. Only then she thought that now Naruto needs someone because his closest friends died. Naruto was with her, when Neji died. So Hinata wanted to be with him, when Sakura and Sasuke died. There was a lot of fuss around, a lot was happening, all people was running, wounded was screaming with pain. Hinata came to the conclusion that Naruto must now be where bodies of his friends are, so she moved where the final launch played up. She saw him from a distance. He and Kakashi was sitting together over the dead, to her surprise, she saw there are three bodies. Sai stood nearby. A little closer to her, Tsunade was providing medical assistance to Gai. Hinata paused, undecided what to do, when Rock Lee went to her.

"Naruto and Sakura rescued Gai-sensei" he said quietly. "If they didn't... And I... I failed to protect Sakura. I was useless."

"Lee... who is this third person... the third body...?" Hinata asked.

"This is Uchiha Obito" Lee said, wiping his eyes. "Sasuke killed him then killed Sakura."

They saw how Kakashi got up and staggered, and Sai came up and uphold him, and showed him first aid point organized by Tsunade. They went there together, but Naruto didn't move from the spot.

"Hinata" said Lee. "I think you should go there. It's the reason why you came. Isn't it?"

She nodded. That was the reason why she came. She took a few steps, stopped, and then confidently moved forward.

Hinata was not selfish. It was not just wanting Naruto physically, wanting his attention. She really loved him, she didn't want him to suffer, she wanted him to be happy. Even if it means that she will be far from him. Naruto's face was dirty from dust, dirt and dried blood. Under this layer he was white as a sheet. Not crying, not moving, Naruto was just sitting there. Hinata didn't want to look at the dead bodies and the puddle of blood where they were lying. It WAS Sakura, it WAS Sasuke, and it WAS the Uchiha Obito, Kakashi-sensei's friend. This ISN'T Sakura, IT'S NO longer Sasuke , IT'S NO longer Uchiha Obito. Not anymore. But this IS Naruto. Dear Naruto. Hinata knelt beside and gently touched the boy's arm. He didn't react. Hinata understood. She had to take a look at them. Just so she could understand a little, because while understanding, she could really help. She lifted her head and looked at the pale faces of two members of the Uchiha clan. And then at Sakura's face. It was calm, she had a half-open eyes. Hinata leaned over, reached out and gently closed the eyes of the girl. And then she took her cold hand, stopped sobbing and slowly began to talk.

"Oh, Compassionate Ones, you who possess the wisdom of understanding, the love of compassion, the power of doing divine deeds, and of protecting in incomprehensible measure. Our friends are passing from this world to the next, they are taking a great leap, the light of this world has faded for them, they have entered solitude with their karmic forces, they have gone into a vast silence, they are borne away by the great ocean of birth and death... oh, Compassionate Ones, protect Sakura, Sasuke and Obito who are defenceless. Be to them like a mother and father. Oh, Compassionate Ones, let not the force of your compassion be weak, but aid them. Let our friends not go into the miserable states of existence. Forget not your ancient vows."

Hinata calmed down. Something was over and she could tell it. Her father said those words once, holding a hand of her mother. Then everyone in the house regained their peace. Hinata learned these words by heart. Sometimes she was repeating them when they killed someone during a mission. But today was the first time she spoke them aloud. Two tears rolled down her face, she welcomed them with stupefaction. And then she remembered about Naruto being here and looked at him. And he was looking at her without saying a word. Tears washed blood and dirt away. She absolutely didn't have the courage to do it. But she did it. She moved closer and hugged him, and to her amazement he clung to her. She wanted him to cry his fill, she knew it always helps.

Did it really matter that he wasn't thinking about her in that moment? No, it didn't.

Because Hinata was the one who really knew what true love is.

Hinata's prayer is the fragment of a real Buddhist Prayer for the Dead and Dying.


End file.
